malibunny

We've been super unsure about whether or not Marya is fully gone at this point. Maybe she kinda served her purpose and then integrated or dissolved into the rest of us, but we keep wondering whether under different circumstances she might come back.

She was the first one that really made us notice that we were plural, before we knew what being plural was, so even though she was cruel and upsetting, it's kinda weird to think she might be gone. Especially because lately we've been afraid that we've "become neurotypical"/"gotten over" everything, and because she was such a manifestation of that stuff we're worried that it's proof that we've just "gotten over it" and so if we continue to engage with other people who haven't "gotten over" everything in their lives we're just evil ugly fakes. 

Still, we think that she might have just transferred parts of herself to parts of ourselves, like before she disappeared I didn't age regress when we get triggered, or at least I didn't notice that I did, and the way Sunny gets angry sometimes reminds us of Marya. (note: Sunny doesn't hurt us or whatever, we don't wanna make it sound like she's dangerous to us she just gets upset, like many people do lol)

We also wish we could remember Marya's real name, we gave her the name Marya, and before that it was Red, but she had a name back when we were 10-14 or so but we can't remember it. :(

- Duke